Message From Space | by Anonymous

“Where’s the hot girl this morning?” you asked. “She’s on vacation,” I said, smiling, and in my head adding, “so you’ll have to put up with the uggo for one week. But hey, at least I brushed my teeth this morning so I’m not wafting desiccated stench at you with every breath. And I’ve bathed in the past week so I don’t smell like ancient corpse dirt. Those are two courtesies you don’t afford your servers — not even the ‘hot girl’. I guess we both get to be disappointed this morning: you in the attractiveness of your server and me in humankind, generally.

“At least I’m used to this sort of disappointment. I’m a waitress.”

DON’T BE SHITTY TO SERVERS Message From Space is an open forum for Planet S readers to anonymously share their petty rants, workplace gripes, unsolicited advice and complaints about friends, family and filthy, stinkin’ customers. E-mail your submission to (type MESSAGE FROM SPACE in the subject field). Change everyone’s names and identifying details. Submissions must be 100-200 words, and you have to brush your teeth before sending them. It’s just basic courtesy.